Well, I have attempted to write several times but seem to stop before the post is finished. Since my last post, I have lived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake with well over 1000 aftershocks in my hometown of Christchurch, New Zealand. Talk about a profound experience. I've tried to explain what it's like to people who weren't here, but unless you've lived through some potentially life-threatening disaster such as this, you really cannot grasp what it's like. The amazing thing is that not one person died - what a miracle! The earthquake hit at approximately 4:30am on Saturday the 4th of September... a few hours earlier or later and there surely would've been casualties. Even with the intensity of some of the aftershocks, no one has died and only a few people even sustained injuries. That just blows me away. Also, to see the sense of unity that has come upon this city as a result of collectively going through something like this is truly inspiring. People who never would've interacted before now are helping each other without prejudice... it's a true sense of community and I only hope and pray that it continues for a long time to come.
I think part of the reason I've struggle to write since the earthquake is because I feel as though I need to mention it, yet I'm not sure what it has to do with living in peace. I do know there is one thing in my experience that I haven't been able to shake (no pun intended.) When the earthquake hit (I was in bed on the top floor of a two-storey house) everything was violently shaking and I jumped out of bed wondering whether to grab my children or not, who were both asleep in their own rooms. I remember thinking to myself, 'If the windows start smashing, I will go and get them,' but they didn't so I waited for the shaking to stop (all up it lasted almost a minute which seems like an eternity in a situation like this) and then I heard my sister yelling to me. I went and checked my older son, who had woken but wasn't scared. My younger son slept through the whole thing and the subsequent aftershocks that began almost immediately afterwards so I decided to leave him to sleep. Through all this, though, I never felt frightened. I never thought I would die, or that my life was in danger. In fact, we all went back to bed after we checked on the house and on a couple of the neighbors, despite the fact that aftershocks were coming regularly from that point onwards. That may sound like no big deal if you weren't here, but when I began speaking to other people in the days and weeks that followed, I was amazed to learn that many had been utterly terrorized and did, in fact, feel as though their lives were at stake. Lots of people struggled with sleep for weeks after the earthquake as aftershocks often hit during the night and I couldn't help but wonder if maybe I'd learned more about living in peace than I originally thought because when put to the test, I actually felt incredibly calm the whole time and didn't suffer any sleep deprivation as a result of the earthquake. As I thought about it, I came to a few possible conclusions: either my life is so intense already that an earthquake doesn't really seem that bad in the big picture of all that I'm currently dealing with; my life truly was NOT at stake, and so I wasn't scared because subconsciously I knew it 'wasn't my time to go'; or possibly I truly have learned to live in a more peaceful state through life's storms and trials. I'm not positive which it is... maybe a combination? I do know that events like these are very subjective and I in no way want to minimize other people's experiences as they are personal to them. I don't judge people for feeling as though it was a life/death situation because for them, that's what they thought it was. For me, it wasn't, and for that I'm grateful.
Moving forward, I feel confident of a couple things... first, I know it isn't my time to go yet and I believe that as long as I have a sense of purpose and a strong reason to live, I don't think I can be 'taken out.' I'm not sure if that sounds presumptuous, but it's what I believe. I have no intention of leaving this earth until my purpose for being here is complete. Second, if there's ever a time to get a grasp of eternity and that we are not just living for the here and now, then now's the time to do it as we are living in perilous times. I'm so glad I have a relationship with Jesus and I wouldn't trade it for anything... He is the Prince of Peace after all, and no true peace can be experienced for any length of time apart from the personal knowledge of him. He's worth getting to know, too. I've never met anyone like Him in my life, and knowing him for myself has given my life more meaning than I ever imagined. He is the best person I know and I will spend the rest of forever getting to know Him better. He pervades everything everywhere with His Spirit and is ever ready to help all who call on Him. I love the fact that no matter where I go or what I do, He is there with me... I just can't get away. If no one got anything out of any of the posts I write except the fact that Jesus is the ultimate peace-giver, then my blog would be a success. :) Until next time...
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