Peace on Earth, Good Will Toward Men

Well, we've just had Christmas and amongst all the holiday festivities, I wanted to take time and reflect on what I'm actually celebrating. I know not all people celebrate Christmas from a Christian point of view and that's fine... I'm merely speaking from the perspective of what Christmas means to me. I think as my relationship with God grows and changes over time, Christmas become even more significant and exciting. Not only because I'm now a mother and I get to watch the excitement of Christmastime on the faces of my children, but also because I feel as though I have a deeper understanding of the awesomeness of the gift that Jesus was/is to us and how He truly is the Prince of Peace. Grasping the reality that it is because of Him that we now enjoy peace with God makes my heart overflow with gratitude. Ultimately for me, knowing that I am at peace with God right now settles in my mind once and for all that NO BAD THING that ever happens to me is ever a result of His judgment or anger for my shortcomings. Jesus took care of that - once and for all. Because of Him, I never have to experience the wrath of God for not being able to measure up to His standard of righteousness. I am righteous now. I am accepted and loved and blessed and made whole now. The issue is this - do I believe it? The more I am able to convince my heart, the very seat of my being, of who I am in Jesus RIGHT NOW, the more peace I will experience in this present life, no matter what may come my way. I am also convinced, more than ever, that we all need to experience this reality for ourselves. No one else can experience it for you. That was the reason Jesus came... not so you could go to God on my behalf, but so that each one of us could experience Him individually. And once you've tasted and seen how good He really is, I promise you, nothing else will come close to satisfying you. He's so good... and every time I think, 'Wow God, I didn't know it could be this good,' He blows me away with some more of His goodness.

I realize many people are pursuing peace on different levels out there. For me, the deepest place of finding peace is understanding that I am at peace with God and that He loves me - and not just understanding this on an intellectual level, but experiencing it in my life. I know I've mentioned a lot about 'experience' in this post, but I'm convinced that it's the place to live. I am tired of speaking about theory, I want to speak from experiential knowledge, as I learn what really works. I may not always get it right, and that's okay, because my goal isn't to get you to see things my way or to follow me, but to whet your appetite to know this for yourself. That's what it's all about. Until next time... happy holidays!

Just Thinkin'...

I wasn't created for a vicarious relationship with God,

I was made to experience Him one-on-one.

That's why Jesus came... so that we would never have to go through another human being to obtain access to God again. He paid the price so that we could live at peace with God forever. No bad thing that is happening in your life is the result of God punishing you. He is at peace with mankind, just not everyone knows it yet! This scripture has come to my mind while I'm typing and so I'll leave you with this thought:

How beautiful on the mountains
are the feet of those who bring good news,
who proclaim peace,
who bring good tidings,
who proclaim salvation,
who say to Zion,
“Your God reigns!

- Isaiah 52:7

Let Go of the Victim in You

I like the idea of a 15 minute time limit to write my thoughts so am going to do it again. I figure this way I can get more posts out (I'll aim for a minimum of 1 per week) rather than attempt to make time to do a mammoth one every so often. Writing regularly keeps the creative juices flowing anyway for me so here goes. This week I want to talk about letting go of a victim mentality and becoming more proactive in our daily lives. Bottom line: life is not fair. Everyone has 'stuff' happen to them in life so no one is exempt from pain. The real question is, 'What are you going to do now?' Trying to control other people's actions is not only exhausting for you, but it also isn't healthy and guarantees you will remain in codependent relationships. The one person I do have control over is ME. We have the power to choose our responses to other people's actions and man, what a power that is. The power of our free will is one of the most untapped resources out there. If more people lived out of an awareness that they, and they alone, can control their attitude, their responses, their actions, I have no doubt that we'd see many more people fulfilling their life's potential and dreams.

Not only does maintaining a victim mentality dis-empower me by placing the results of my current life circumstances in the hands of other people (and possibly people who don't even care for or love me,) but it pretty much ensures that unless I find a way to make everyone else act the way I want them to (because, after all, they and not me are the controllers of my future) I am doomed to never have the life I want. I'm not saying we ignore the pains that others have inflicted - knowingly or unknowingly - upon us. What I am saying is that the benefits that come from forgiving and releasing people empower MY life and vastly outweigh the 'growing pains' that I may experience when I choose to let go of blaming the 'outer world' for my inner turmoil.

I recently read 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People' and one of the most impacting personal epiphanies for Stephen Covey in the book was when he came across a quotation that said, 'Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In those choices lie our growth and our happiness.'

I'm outta time so I'll leave you with that thought. :)

Be Yourself (Pt 1)?

I'm trying something new. Often I don't write because I seem to need a lot of time to get a post finished. Today I thought I'd give myself a time limit of 15 minutes. A post in 15 minutes... this will force me to think on my feet and not over-analyze what I'm writing (which I sometimes do.) Anyway, two minutes are down already so better keep going.

One of the things that has really begun to surface again and again in my times of personal reflection and meditation is the inherent need in all of us to 'be yourself.' I am 35 years old and for the first time - not ever, but in a long time - I feel as though I am reconnecting to the person I was created to be. Throughout life, social scripting, life experiences, culture, hurts, other people's expectations - the list goes on - all act as external pressures or forces that try to push us into their molds, and often those molds are not helpful in allowing us to truly express who we really are. I am convinced that many people live their lives attempting to be the person they feel they are expected to be, without really connecting to the person God has created them to be. I know this analogy may be overused, but I really see myself as a butterfly emerging from a cocoon. That's where I feel I am in this 'season' in my life. I keep getting that mental picture when I think about where I'm headed at the moment, and at first, I thought 'What a waste... it's taken me 35 years to get to the place where the butterfly in me is emerging. Why couldn't it have happened earlier?' The temptation was to 'write off' the earlier years of my life as 'useless' and then the thought occurred to me, 'EVERY stage in a butterfly's life is vital in getting to the end result. Nothing is wasted!' The larvae stage is just as important as the adult stage and even though we think of the butterfly as the 'best' phase of life, there would be no butterfly without the previous phases bringing it to the place of maturity. With this thought, I relaxed a bit and I feel much better now.

In regards to peace, I think that the sheer decision to pursue a life of peace has been instrumental in bringing me to the place where I feel the 'real Mel' can emerge. I haven't felt so comfortable in my own skin in years. I haven't cared so little about what other people think of me in years. I realized that much of my own life has been spent trying to be the person other people wanted me to be rather than the person I was created from the beginning to be.

Anyway, my 15 minutes is up. I will talk more about this - maybe - later. Bye for now.

A Whole Lotta Shakin'

Well, I have attempted to write several times but seem to stop before the post is finished. Since my last post, I have lived through a 7.1 magnitude earthquake with well over 1000 aftershocks in my hometown of Christchurch, New Zealand. Talk about a profound experience. I've tried to explain what it's like to people who weren't here, but unless you've lived through some potentially life-threatening disaster such as this, you really cannot grasp what it's like. The amazing thing is that not one person died - what a miracle! The earthquake hit at approximately 4:30am on Saturday the 4th of September... a few hours earlier or later and there surely would've been casualties. Even with the intensity of some of the aftershocks, no one has died and only a few people even sustained injuries. That just blows me away. Also, to see the sense of unity that has come upon this city as a result of collectively going through something like this is truly inspiring. People who never would've interacted before now are helping each other without prejudice... it's a true sense of community and I only hope and pray that it continues for a long time to come.

I think part of the reason I've struggle to write since the earthquake is because I feel as though I need to mention it, yet I'm not sure what it has to do with living in peace. I do know there is one thing in my experience that I haven't been able to shake (no pun intended.) When the earthquake hit (I was in bed on the top floor of a two-storey house) everything was violently shaking and I jumped out of bed wondering whether to grab my children or not, who were both asleep in their own rooms. I remember thinking to myself, 'If the windows start smashing, I will go and get them,' but they didn't so I waited for the shaking to stop (all up it lasted almost a minute which seems like an eternity in a situation like this) and then I heard my sister yelling to me. I went and checked my older son, who had woken but wasn't scared. My younger son slept through the whole thing and the subsequent aftershocks that began almost immediately afterwards so I decided to leave him to sleep. Through all this, though, I never felt frightened. I never thought I would die, or that my life was in danger. In fact, we all went back to bed after we checked on the house and on a couple of the neighbors, despite the fact that aftershocks were coming regularly from that point onwards. That may sound like no big deal if you weren't here, but when I began speaking to other people in the days and weeks that followed, I was amazed to learn that many had been utterly terrorized and did, in fact, feel as though their lives were at stake. Lots of people struggled with sleep for weeks after the earthquake as aftershocks often hit during the night and I couldn't help but wonder if maybe I'd learned more about living in peace than I originally thought because when put to the test, I actually felt incredibly calm the whole time and didn't suffer any sleep deprivation as a result of the earthquake. As I thought about it, I came to a few possible conclusions: either my life is so intense already that an earthquake doesn't really seem that bad in the big picture of all that I'm currently dealing with; my life truly was NOT at stake, and so I wasn't scared because subconsciously I knew it 'wasn't my time to go'; or possibly I truly have learned to live in a more peaceful state through life's storms and trials. I'm not positive which it is... maybe a combination? I do know that events like these are very subjective and I in no way want to minimize other people's experiences as they are personal to them. I don't judge people for feeling as though it was a life/death situation because for them, that's what they thought it was. For me, it wasn't, and for that I'm grateful.

Moving forward, I feel confident of a couple things... first, I know it isn't my time to go yet and I believe that as long as I have a sense of purpose and a strong reason to live, I don't think I can be 'taken out.' I'm not sure if that sounds presumptuous, but it's what I believe. I have no intention of leaving this earth until my purpose for being here is complete. Second, if there's ever a time to get a grasp of eternity and that we are not just living for the here and now, then now's the time to do it as we are living in perilous times. I'm so glad I have a relationship with Jesus and I wouldn't trade it for anything... He is the Prince of Peace after all, and no true peace can be experienced for any length of time apart from the personal knowledge of him. He's worth getting to know, too. I've never met anyone like Him in my life, and knowing him for myself has given my life more meaning than I ever imagined. He is the best person I know and I will spend the rest of forever getting to know Him better. He pervades everything everywhere with His Spirit and is ever ready to help all who call on Him. I love the fact that no matter where I go or what I do, He is there with me... I just can't get away. If no one got anything out of any of the posts I write except the fact that Jesus is the ultimate peace-giver, then my blog would be a success. :) Until next time...

Congruence

con·gru·ence - the state or quality of being in agreement; correspondence; harmony

I've been thinking about this concept for a few weeks now and I believe it is a big key to maintaining a lifestyle of peace. Living a congruent life - where I engage as many of my faculties (mental, emotional, spiritual etc.) as I can in the pursuit of a specific goal or way of 'being' must be a major key in obtaining the desired end. Personally, I am realizing how much of my life has been lived out of obligation. 'Should,' 'must,' 'have to' have been common expressions in my self-talk but I'm seeing how dis-empowering thoughts like that actually are. Living with a clear purpose that I am actively able to 'engage' with on multiple levels of my being gives me not only a sense of vision and motivation for my future, but also a sense of freedom. If I don't actively live my life, life will just happen to me.

I'm not sure how a person could truly live a peaceful life apart from living a congruent life. Obviously, that may require time spent in discovering what your deepest values actually are and then building from the ground up, so to speak, so that your outward actions don't disagree with what is really important to you. I'm definitely 'pro' writing a personal life mission statement and even though I regularly 'tweak' mine, the underlying values are still the same. I see experiencing an abiding peace in my life as directly related to my ability to have as many aspects of 'me' lined up and in agreement with each other as possible. I don't mean this to sound like a big 'striving' session. In fact, the further I go, the more I am learning to 'settle down' into things that are already mine. So much of what life has to offer doesn't seem to be in the 'getting' but rather in the 'being' and then from that state of being, letting what's already there naturally 'flow' out. I'm finding this hard to explain because the bulk of what I'm learning about peace is difficult for me to put into words. I initially thought this blog would be easy to write because I am so excited about this journey that I'm on, but because this is such a personal experience for me, I feel like telling other people what they should or shouldn't do in order to know the things I'm talking about for themselves seems prescriptive and that's not what I want to do. I guess if something I say here inspires you to go on your own journey, then great, but it will be just that - your journey, with your experiences, your perceptions, your challenges and your victories. Perhaps you've already started and are further down the track than I am. For me, all I can say is that my life is truly getting better and better everyday and I can't wait to see what is up around the next bend. It's THAT good. :-)

Peace vs Stress

I haven't written anything in awhile. Not from lack of desire, but rather lack of inspiration. Maybe it's my perfectionism rearing its ugly head because I don't like writing anything unless it's going to be something I consider really worthwhile. Unfortunately, perfectionism and peace don't always go hand in hand. One of the biggest things I've noticed during this journey is all of the 'enemies' of peace that I encounter in my daily life. If I'm going to place peace in the position of importance and prioritize it the way I intend to, then inevitably some of the current habits in my life are going to be challenged. One big one is my 'need' to be right (but I might devote an entire post to this later on so won't go into my thoughts on that right now.) I'm also learning to recognize the stress levels that I allow myself to live under. Stress in its various forms is such a huge contributor to disease and for me I know that I must reduce some of the stress levels I experience if I want to live life at it's best. I know some physical stress is environmental and can't be avoided but what I'm more specifically referring to is emotional stress such as living in fear or anxiety about things that one has little or no control over. I'm sure there are many studies that have been conducted in regards to the effects of stress on the body which the reader can study in their spare time should they feel the urge. I guess because this is a somewhat 'subjective' blog on my personal experiences with learning to live in peace, I will aim to keep my writing relevant to my journey.

This is what I'm learning. Peace brings clarity. Fear brings confusion, and for me, a type of 'paralysis' when it comes to making good decisions. Fear-based decisions tend to beget more fear-based decisions. If I'm confronted with a difficult choice or decision, it's better to buy myself time and get the internal voices in my head to quiet down rather than charge into something motivated by urgency and later on end up regretting it. The Bible says 'let peace act as an umpire' (Col. 3:15 AMP) which to me says that any absence of peace should be a clear indicator that we've gotten off track somewhere. Unfortunately, I believe so many of us are used to living in some level of stress or chaos - internally and externally- that we wouldn't know how to get back to a place of peace even if we wanted to. What does peace even look/feel like and how do I get there and stay there? How do I break the old habit patterns that are 'grooved' into the neural pathways of my brain? How do I learn to recognise when I've deviated from the path of peace? I know this isn't an overnight 'makeover.' I've taken years to get to the place that I'm at now. Some thinking habits have been there since I was a child. Now I am slowly reprogramming my mind/heart to take new thought 'pathways.' I'm creating a new 'normal' and that is taking some time. Some days and weeks feel as though I'm moving at a snail's pace whereas others seem filled with breakthrough. This is definitely a journey... most likely one I will be on for the rest of my life. My desire is that as time passes and I look back, I will be able to see definite progress that I can use to encourage and pass on to others wanting to take similar steps in their own lives.

Itching to Write

I'm really 'itching' to write something but nothing inspirational has really struck me this last week so I'm going to keep this post short and sweet. I've been reading the New Testament in the Message Bible and I love the way the Beatitudes are portrayed in modern day vernacular. For instance, instead of 'Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven' the Message says, 'You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.' Instead of 'Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted' we have ' You're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One who is most dear to you.' The list goes on and they're all great food for thought. If you don't have a Message Bible, I encourage you to look them up sometime. That's really all I've got to say right now. Not much I know, but I wanted to write something.

In closing, since this is a blog on peace, I guess should finish with the version of 'Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God.' The Message says 'You're blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That's when you discover who you really are, and your place in God's family.'

My prayer is that whoever reads these words comes to the experiential realization of their place in God's family- precious, irreplaceable, and worth the exchange of Jesus' life for theirs.

People Trump Things

A couple of weeks ago, I was trying to 'fit' some time in for myself around housework, childcare, cooking, and the myriad of other tasks that seem to cry out for my attention on a daily basis. I had managed to get both boys to sleep and get some of the 'necessities' done before collapsing onto my bed for a few minutes of R and R (aka listening to my iPod or a bit of book reading) when Joel, my youngest, woke up. I inwardly groaned in dismay because I REALLY REALLY felt as though I needed a break and I hadn't had one and I was tired and to be honest, just a bit pissed off that he'd not slept longer. I sat on my bed for a minute and got 'real' with God. 'I don't know how I'm going to do this! I'm tired, overwhelmed, annoyed, and You know I want to walk in peace, love, and all that jazz but I am truly at the end of myself today and I don't think I have anything more to give out at this minute, especially to my child, who is so dependent on me for everything. How am I supposed to get everything done that needs doing and still keep my sanity?' Not feeling any 'Divine' inspiration at that moment, I got up and walked into his room because I didn't want his crying to wake his brother. As I got him out of bed, this little 'nugget' dropped into my heart. People trump things.

Instantly my perspective became clear and I felt peace return to my emotions. Ah-ha! So that's how it works. Obvious, some may say, but at that moment, it was exactly what I needed to hear to see the forest from the trees again. It's amazing how three words can put so much into perspective. As a full time mother of two very active toddlers, my days sometimes feel like an endless blur of activity and I sometimes struggle to keep my priorities straight. Hearing those words just hit the nail on the head for me. When two or more things are vying for my attention, the one that involves people will always win. Dishes or playing with my sons? Sons win. Watching tv or taking 5 minutes to connect with my husband and see how his day went? Hubby wins. Someone once said that relationships are the only things we will take with us into eternity. I wholeheartedly agree.

Now I know there is a time and place for 'work' and I'm not saying children should run the roost and never learn to entertain themselves, but I know that I can easily become task-focused if I let myself and keeping this little 'mantra' in the back of my mind helps me take a step back every now and then and re-assess what's really important. For me, they are the people in my life. Everything else, no matter how pressing, can either be fit in around my relationships or I will seriously consider whether I need it. If nothing else, it motivates me to be more organised with my time so that I can get the 'things' done that need to be done AS WELL AS spend the time with the people I love.

Three words. Simple, yet they have hugely impacted my life from that day forward and will do so for a long time to come. What's important in your life and are the things you think are priorities REALLY going to matter that much in the big scheme of things?

My first post

Welcome! I've just outlined what I'm doing in my other blog because I thought I would keep everything together in one spot but have decided to in fact, start a blog specifically for this 'journey' I'm taking over the next 10-12 months (maybe longer.) I will recap quickly, otherwise just check out my post on mooseacres.blogspot.com called 'Living in Peace.'

I turned 35 a few weeks ago and, like I do on all my birthdays, took stock of how things are going in my life and where I'm going, what my goals are, etc etc. One thing that really struck me as I was evaluating what my priorities are is how much I actually want to live in an abiding sense of peace on a daily, moment-by-moment basis. So much of my 'inner' life has been marked by anxiety, worry, feelings of failure, and a general 'overthinking' of almost everything I do. Now don't get me wrong, I love life and I would say in many ways I am very happy and very aware of the blessings that surround me, but when I'm really honest with myself, deep down there is often a sense that I could be living in so much more than what I'm currently experiencing. A few days after my birthday this year, I woke up one morning with what I would call a 'compulsion' to live in peace. I have been taking some active steps towards living in a more peaceful state for a number of months now, but this day it was like a little voice was saying, 'This isn't just a good idea anymore, you NEED to make this a priority and allow the internal changes in you to take place to bring you to a place where the outside world doesn't rock you when it's not going the way you want it to.' After all, I will ultimately 'prosper as my soul prospers.' The change starts with me! This 'compulsion' wasn't a fearful one, but it had a no-nonsense feel to it.

Anyway, I made a deep decision that day that whatever had to change about the way I think, feel, and 'view' reality in order to abide in a state of peace, then so be it. I was brushing my teeth a few days later, thinking about how I like to write my thoughts down and all of a sudden I thought, 'Write a blog... you never know who will be blessed by this journey you're on' and so voila! Here it is. I will write as often as I can with any thoughts, insights, and breakthroughs I have as a result of this decision. Already, I have begun seeing changes in my perspectives and paradigms and I'm sure many more are to follow. My desire with this blog is to be as transparent as possible because I want to live in Truth and Light and Love and my sincere hope is that this journey not only inspires and encourages the reader, but also challenges and provokes you to ask some truly important questions about what you're doing here and where you're going. Blessings!